Twenty Years

Group shot!

Blurry but cute. 

El Billy y Jeff.

SP 

Super sweaty but happy to finally see The Pumpkins.

It's been twenty years since the last time I saw the Pumpkins. Twenty. Fucken. Years. Ok, maybe not twenty, I did win tickets to a secret show thanks to KROQ (back when it was cool) and got to see them in 2000. That's besides the point and does not make for a good blog! Besides it wasn't a true concert, it was a secret show. Ha!

Smashing Pumpkins has always been ONE of my all time favorite bands. I remember being a kid, walking into Music+ (that was a magical place where they sold nothing but music; true story) and picking up my first CD: Siamese Dreams. That was the first CD I was able to buy with my own money. I remember I couldn't wait to get home and play it. Even the unwrapping of the CD was a spiritual experience for me. I made sure to be careful as to not to damage the booklet when I took it out of the CD case. I carefully placed the CD in my boombox and proceeded to get lost in music. It was so fucken magical. I remember staying up late to watch the "WORLD PREMIERE" of the Disarm video. I had to be one of the first to see it. It somehow made me feel like I was a bigger fan if I made these sacrifices for my band. I was no fucken poser, that was for damn sure!

When the Pumpkins split I was bummed but saw it coming. It was time. There was so much drama going on within the band. Even now, unfortunately, there seems to be unresolved issues. It sucks but is what it is. I was pretty bummed when I heard D'arcy would not be joining the reunion tour. I was hesitant at first about seeing the band but realized there was no way I could miss it. I had seen the band in the past, all the original members, just never together. I thought this tour would finally be it, but alas it was not meant to be. I don't care. Just being able to see the majority of the original members live, again, was a true gift in itself.

I'm grateful for my friend Leo coming through and spotting me a ticket. I was planning on going no matter what, but had the intentions of showing up by myself. I didn't care if I rocked out by alone, I was going to that show. Leo being the good friend that he is, opted not to have me be solo and bought me and another friend our tickets. We technically weren't suppose to sit together since we didn't have the same seats, but ended up sitting together most of the show. We just kept getting moved around because the rightful owners of the seats kept showing up. It was truly nineties vibe ha! 

The band ended up playing for a little over 3 hours. I feel it was a great way to pay tribute to their fans. They played most of my favorites. I didn't get to enjoy Thirty-Three as much because it was one of the times we had to move and find somewhere else to sit. We got moved around so much that security knew who I was. I had blown my cover. That guy was a dick. Fuck him. 

The song I was super happy to hear, and was played close to the end of show, was Muzzle. I freaking love that song! My favorite line is the first line, "I fear that I'm ordinary just like everyone." I remember listening to that song over and over when I was in high school and starting it from the beginning multiple times just so I can hear that verse. I always felt it deep in my bones. 

I kinda regret going both nights but maybe they'll play again soon. All in all it was a good show and great memories. We ended up taking a Lyft to the show which turned out to be a great idea since we were pretty much done by the end of the show. I also forgot to mention that we almost got kicked out thanks to Leo almost getting in a fight...but maybe I'll talk about that next time hehe.